Uncertain feelings leads to rash actions
by Jedi Queen 001
Summary: Yami was completely devoted to Yugi but he was never able to tell him. But when Yami found out about Yugi's girlfriend, he sends himself to the Shadow Realm. Afterwards, Yugi falls into a depression, will Yami ever return? Or will Yugi live life alone?
1. Kristy

Hiya everyone, yes it's back and I've made corrections - but knowing my luck, I've missed some. I will update very soon, I've almost finished writing the third chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh!

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Uncertain feelings leads to rash actions.

Chapter One,

Kristy…

Yami stared at Yugi's empty bed. His imprint gave Yami the imaginary sensation of seeing his face. Yami had missed his chance, yet again! He couldn't understand why he couldn't tell Yugi how he felt. They had been dancing around each other for years and when the time finally came, when the perfect moment arrived; he choked. And Yugi would walk away.

He remembered all the nights he'd sit at the end of Yugi's bed and stare at him, sleeping like a new born angel. So soft, were his cheeks and yet so fragile, as if he would dismantle at first touch. Within Yami's eye's, every aspect of Yugi was perfection. There were no faults or flaws in his design, no glitch or mistake; he was perfect.

A single tear spilled down his face, as he mumbled harsh words to himself. As if he were telling himself off.

Suddenly he heard a female voice ring from down stairs. Quickly jumped up, he walked to the hall way. He stared in horror as Yugi linked arms with a young girl and walked out the door.

She was fair and quite slim, Yugi's height, with long black hair. Yugi's Grandpa waved them off and slowly shut the door behind them. As the door seemed to sway slowly, Yami could see Yugi steal a quick kiss from her rose tinted cheek.

At that precise moment, Yami ran back into their room and grabbed the first thing he could find. With an incredible force, he flung it against the nearest wall. Unfortunately, it was a photo frame - the glass flew in each direction and a picture gracefully landed on the floor.

Yami plonked himself to the floor and sobbed hard into his knee's. His tears could not describe the shier pain his heart put him through. Nothing meant more to him than having his sweet aibou in his arm's once more. He'd give anything to have Yugi with him.

'I'm always messing things up around him, now I'll never pluck up enough courage to tell him that I love him. Maybe it'll be better for the both of us if I just leave him alone. Without my constant intrusions, he can have more free time with, w-with, his girlfriend.'

Soon, Mr Muto charged up the stairs and sort to comfort him. Patting Yami's shoulder's, he gave him a warm hug. Allowing his tear's to flow freely, he did not hold back. Mr Muto stared at the broken frame, Yami noticed this and apologized.

"Now, now Yami. No need to apologize, I know it hurts but you have to try and guide Yugi through his life and not feel envious of Kristy." He nodded, he understood that Yugi's happiness was more important. But he couldn't bare to look at Yugi after what he saw, to have Yugi's lips upon his cheek was all he had ever dreamed of. To wake to his radiant face beside him was his wildest fantasy and to comfort him so tenderly when he were hurt or upset was to be his most humble duty and pleasure.

Yami's sobs quietened and Yugi's Grandpa decided to leave him for a while. As he left, he picked up the picture that fell from the frame and handed it to Yami. His shaky hand smoothed out the creases of the glossy paper. He stared down in amazement, he had forgotten that day, instead of a tear - it was a blush that emerged from his face.

He suddenly clutched the picture tight to his chest and placed it inside his pocket. Standing up, he decided to clean the glass from the floor. Slowly trudging downstairs, he picked up a broom and dustpan. As he passed Mr Muto, he thanked him graciously and returned to his room.

Soon the floor was glass free and he dumped the last of the shards into a cardboard box, ready to be taken to the dustbins. He pulled open a draw from their desk and grabbed a pen, he swiftly wrote, 'glass' on the cardboard and was about to close the draw. When something caught his eye…

The Millennium Rod.

He picked it up and grasped it tightly his hand, he suddenly felt a slight tingling, the sensation of power rushed through his body. It grew the more he held it, with a flick of the wrist, he swayed it for right to left, in gold waves of motion.

The sudden spark of laughter came from downstairs, it seemed Yugi had returned with his girlfriend. The sharp pain in his heart swiftly returned and he ripped at every valve, then spreading through out his body.

He sniffled slightly and suddenly; the thought came to him, as swiftly as the north winds whip across the lands.

'If I weren't here; if I'd just leave.'

"Very well Yugi, this is for you…" Yami inhaled deeply and raised the rod high above his head.

"I; Pharaoh Yami order you to transport me to the shadow realm!!" The rod rapidly shone to life. It's radiant glow filled the room, however it was soon replaced by oozing clouds of darkness. The rod slipped from his hand, as he watched his body begin to gradually disappear.

"Y-Yami…" There stood Yugi, watching in absolute dismay - as his guardian slowly seeped into the black shadows. Yugi shook his head and gazed upon Yami's apologetic face.

He spoke in a gruff tone, "Yugi; I'm so sorry. Now, you'll have more time with Kristy. I'm leaving now…" He sounded weak and his face was the most palest Yugi had ever looked upon.

"Yami! No!!! Don't leave me!!" Yami shook his head, his chest was now gone and his neck was vanishing as well.

"This is my last chance Yugi…… I'll always love-" Unable to finish, Yami was completely soaked up by shadows and left in his place, was the Millennium Rod. Yugi bent down and picked it up, clutching it tight to his chest, he broke down and laid on the floor, letting his tears spill.

As his heart began to brake down; unknown to the small boy; that he was about to endure the greatest heart ache of his life.


	2. Realizations

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!

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Chapter two

Realizations…

Later that same tragic day, Yugi sat cuddled in his Grandpa's arms. Still sobbing over the loss of his dear guardian, his Yami; his best friend. His eye's were lined with a deep red and his nose still continued to run. Mr Muto pulled up his blanket, to cover his chilly chest, he shivered with each gasp he inhaled. His Grandpa stared down at him with great sympathy in his eye's, he had never felt so unhappy for his young grandson.

He watched from afar, as Yugi and Yami grew as a team, he watched Yami fall madly in love with him. Yugi was also in love with Yami, sadly, he hadn't realised it yet and fell for his old school friend. Yes, they spent a lot of time together and yes they built a lot of trust over the years.

But she would never rival against Yami.

He had the ability to be charming and funny at the same time. One minuet, they'd be in a deep and meaningful conversation. Next, Yugi would be laughing at one of his witty jokes. The boys had a certain spark between them. It was as the Gods had drafted their relationship from their first meeting. Mr Muto had only seen that type of spark between his Grandson's parents. He felt privileged to watch over another glorious affiliation once more.

He could see their future, married, with adopted children, a little house in the suburbs or the country. He smiled; he was getting ahead of himself. His thoughts were suddenly interrupted by Kristy's entry.

She came and handed Yugi another cup of hot chocolate. His shaky hand grasped it weakly, therefore Mr Muto placed his hand swiftly under it and assisted Yugi to hold it to his quivering mouth. Taking in a gulp, he let his Grandpa rest it on the coffee table.

Kristy bent down before him. Her hazel eye's examined Yugi closely, she could sense his intense sorrow; and it frightened her. Mr Muto saw it in her eye's; she knew where his emotions laid with.

She brushed back a strand of his hair and smiled weakly. She quickly peered at her wristwatch and announced that she should leave.

"Okay, take care." Yugi spoke in a fragile state. He gave her a quick kiss and she took her leave.

As soon as the door shut, Yugi sprang from his seat and let the blanket fall to the floor, revealing the Millennium Rod. He still shook and spoke swiftly.

"Oh my Gods Grandpa, he left, he left me!!!! He's never, ever coming back!!!! Why?! Why did he leave Grandpa?!" He suddenly fell to a squat and cried harder.

"I'm not sure my boy, I'm not sure…" He lied; of course. It would have been too much for his Grandson to handle if he knew that Yami had loved him all along. He leaned back and huddled his knee's.

"Grandpa, I feel so weak; so awful." He tried his best to comfort Yugi by smiling but it didn't work.

"It hurts, so much more than it's suppose to. It's like a piece of string is wrapped tightly around my heart. With each passing breath… it hurts - so very badly. I-I- I need Yami." He blurted out and cuddled in his Grandpa's arms again.

"Oh Yugi, I'm so sorry… Look there are many secrets we don't know about the Millennium Rod, Yami must have remembered something about his past. I'll tell you what, I'll call Arthur Hawkins and you go get some sleep. Okay?" Yugi slowly nodded and rubbed his nose into his sleeve. He gradually got up and trudged upstairs.

Leaving the Rod behind. Without hesitation, Mr Muto picked it up and went straight to the phone. He quickly dialled Arthur's number and waited rather impatiently for his answer.

"Um, hello."

"Yes, hello Arthur, I'm sorry to disturb you but I have an emergency here. I need you to come over right away, it concerns an item." Mr Muto rose an eyebrow at his complete corporation.

"Yes, Rebecca is more than welcome to join you, good. I'll see you first thing in the morning." He put down the phone and grasped the Rod in his hand.

"Oh, Yami, please come home soon…he needs you." Mr Muto put down the item and went to check on Yugi.

Meanwhile, Yami's fate did not seem too bright either.

He lay in the shadows, quivering and shaking from lack of heat. The Shadow realm was not good for someone used to Egyptian warmth. In every direction, all he saw was dark caverns of pitch black. No comfort came from darkness, there was no light to be seen and he feared that light would never come again.

"Well, well, well. What do we have here…" Yami turned his head and stared in dismay as Bakura appeared before him. With his arm's crossed, he stared down and chuckled at Yami's pathetic form.

"He has you totally whipped." Yami clenched his chest, as his heart ached even more. The shier thought of his little beloved caused his heart to blister with flames of forbidden love. His eye's swelled with tears.

"T-t-that's not true." However Bakura cut in.

"Now, now. I've been watching you; he has you wrapped around his little finger; and it's pitiable. He smiles and you wobble at the knee's. He laughs and I can feel your heart pump with happiness; its enough to make you sick. He controls you…" Yami rolled from his back to his feet.

"No! Yugi doesn't control me; it's different… Besides, how have you been watching me?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Yami stared down to the floor, ignoring his response. Nothing would have pleased him more to look upon Yugi's face on more time. He softened his eyebrow's, as the image of Yugi's sleeping face appeared before him.

"Awww, having regrets already?" Yami scowled and began to walk away.

"We all do, when we're alone. But we don't have to be. Not anymore…" Yami spun round, ready to blow his head off. Only to find Bakura had taken his shirt off.

"Hey, put that back on right now!!" Bakura frowned sarcastically and turned back. Yami eyed him carefully, in case he tried anything. As he put it back on, he looked around in an aimless daze, as the threat decreased.

Suddenly, by accident he noticed a bulge in Bakura's trousers. Yami squirmed in disgusted and turned away.

Bakura smirked and walked toward him, wrapping his arm's around Yami's waist. Pulling him into his erection.

"Ah!! Get off of me!!!!! I don't want to know where got that!!! Even though I have a pretty good idea!!" Yami forced out of Bakura's vice grip and fell to the floor.

"Well; no and…yes. Don't get excited but you should know a few things about this place." Bakura smugly licked his lips. Yami's eye's widened and shook his head.

"No I don't!!!!!" He began to gradually crawl away. Bakura huffed and turned opposite him, there was something different about Bakura.

"Well; perhaps you should look at your hand." Yami narrowed his eye's and put up his hand.

"Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm turning into a shadow!!!!" It was true, his hand was nothing but a swaying reflection of their surroundings

"Yes, that's right. The shadows feed on your soul until you become a mere shadow. The only way to stay in human form, is to-"

"No fucking way!!!! I'm not going to screw you to stay in human form!! I'm not going to need to be in human form!!!" Yami angrily folded his arms and walked away.

"And why is that? I thought you loved your little aibou. There may be a way to return to him, but do you want to turn up like a black deformed mess?" Bakura still poked that sensitive spot in his heart.

"I do love Yugi!! That's why I'm here…he doesn't feel the same way. I'm always bugging him about it, every time I try to talk to him about it, I can't ever bring myself to tell him. And now, I find out that he has a girlfriend…. Not that you'd care." Yami walked away again, this time with a aggravated expression on his stern face. He was almost out of sight, when Bakura shouted to him.

"Well, if you ever change your mind and want to return home…I'll be right here." He smirked and watched as the Pharaoh vanished into the darkness.

Yami kept walking forward, until he could see no more of that menacing manipulator. He rapidly collapsed to the floor and shivered instantly, once more. He rolled into a ball and peered down at his hand again. Another length of his finger's had turned black as the deep night.

He whipped his head round and saw no one. His face screwed up and shed tears, he couldn't go home - he had to face the inevitable. He was turning into a shadow and nothing could stop that. He could give in to Bakura and force himself to have sex with him, but he'd never betray Yugi that way. Even if he had to learn to move on.

And there he laid, no friends to ease his pain; and time was running thin for the mighty Pharaoh.

The moon shone high where the darkness dwelled, Yugi laid on his belly, staring out the window. He had stop crying now, however - as you can imagine, the pain remained. Yugi would stay up late and watch the moon. Think about all the things he could compare it with. Colours, good and evil etc.

However it was something different this night. The air seemed bitter for the present time of year and the wind seemed to creep into Yugi's room, even with the window shut. He felt the breeze of his face and shifted his weight to his back. Leaning his head right back, he stared at the moon again.

The different comparison he thought about was one of great importance in his life. It was also personal and very comforting, in his dark hours of being alone.

Tonight, Yugi thought of his beloved friend, of course - it was quite fitting, considering what had happened earlier. His eye's stared up at the moon and foresaw his own reflection. And in the darkness that surrounded his likeness, was Yami.

For a brief moment, he thought of it in a different manner. It was his heart that centred the darkness. He blushed as he remembered the sensation of Yami's warm breath upon his neck. He suddenly sat up and stared at nothing in particular.

His breath was short and winded.

He found himself questioning his sentiment's. If he were already attached, why was he thinking of a past moment - with someone different? He had been with Kristy for over a year, he had to keep it a secret from Yami. This was to avoid hurting his feelings, Yugi knew that Yami had a vast infatuation for him and attempted many times to express his feelings. And failed each time, that would be when Yugi felt relief and yet sad. Though he had never noticed it till now.

There would always be a feeling of doubt and tension between the two once his attempt failed. Yugi pounded it a moment longer, before his Grandpa entered.

"Yugi, you still awake my boy?" Yugi shifted round and sat on the end of his bed. His Grandpa walked in and sat next to Yugi, wrapping an arm around him.

Rocking them back and forth, "I'm glad you're feeling better." Yugi nodded, still sadly though.

"I've made that call and guess what? Rebecca is coming as well." Yugi groaned and rolled his eye's.

"I thought you liked Rebecca?" Yugi sighed and got up, walked over to the window, he stared at the moon again.

"She's all like, Yugi my love!" He mimicked sarcastically. Mr Muto chuckled and watched as his Grandson stared out the window again.

"Grandpa. Why is it that I'm not so sure about my feelings any more?" Mr Muto blinked with a blank face and joined him at the window.

"Well Yugi, I'm not sure myself. Perhaps because of the days events, you've turned your attention to Yami instead of Kristy all the time." Yugi's eye's widened.

"Do I really spent a lot of time with Kristy then?" His Grandpa replied with a nod. Yugi turned away and ran his hand's through his hair in an act of panic.

"That's it Grandpa, he left because I drove him away.." His voice returned to it's shaky state.

"No Yugi, it's not that… it's not." Yugi turned back and eyed him carefully.

"You know something, don't you?!" He launched forward and gripped his Grandpa by the shirt.

"Please tell me!!" His eye's pleaded with him. No words were needed for the pain he felt, thinking it were his own fault. He couldn't imagine how he would react if it were truly his own fault. However is Grandpa shook his head and refused to tell him of Yami's true intensions.

"All in due time Yugi - you'll be able to ask Yami yourself." He began to walk out the room, leaving Yugi to decide on his true feelings.

"Grandpa," Yugi called back as Mr Muto held onto the handle of his door, he could hear the softness in his tone once more. As if he were longing for it to return; and he had.

"I think I'm in love with him." Mr Muto neither looked back or replied, he simply nodded and left the room.


	3. The beginning of the end

Thanks for your reviews, they really inspire me to keep going. Here's chapter three, I hope you like the story so far.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!

_Chapter three_

_The beginning of the end_

Yugi stared aimlessly across their bedroom.

"Why, are we doing this Yami?" His guardian ran his nibble fingers along Yugi's back. Soothing every nerve with his tender touch. Yugi melted beneath this loving sensation, he had never before felt so good; so comforted. Yami swiftly leaned down and nibbled at Yugi's neck, the little one gasped at the feel of hot breath on his cool flesh. Suddenly, Yami began to suck on his neck, licking his now sore skin.

"I'm so, sorry aibou, I can't seem to stop myself…" Yugi shook his head and shifted his body to face him. He leaned forward, until their forehead's touched. Something enigmatic was at work, each of them preyed that this moment would never end. They would rather spent an eternity in this lusty state, than hide it from the world. Yugi eyes swam with emotion, his eyes begged for fulfilment.

"No Yami; I-I don't want you to stop." They came together in unison and shared a deep, yet gentle pure kiss. Yugi knew it was wrong, he was already going out with Kristy - Perhaps it was his hormones but then, why didn't he want to proceed any further, usually teenagers would want to go much further in a state of hormonal manipulation. But Yugi did not wish to go any further but to remain like this, to feel so complete to be in Yami's arm's and to be loved by him; always.

"Yugi, this is my twelfth phone call, please Yugi - if you're there - pick up! I'm really worried about you. I know you're upset but why don't you pick up and talk to me about it. I'm positive it will help you… please Yugi? Okay when you feel like talking, call me back, okay bye Yugi - love you honey." Love you?

Yugi didn't look at his phone, he was far too wrapped up in guilt. The first kiss he had shared with Kristy didn't mean even a quarter as much as Yami's did. Why didn't he see it sooner? He didn't want Kristy, he _needed _Yami. It was true that Kristy was a wonderful friend, but Yugi now realised that he only wanted to be close to someone, his desire to be wanted was so great, he displaced his feelings onto someone he really didn't know at all. Just because you know someone for years, doesn't mean that you really know that person.

And what was even worse now was that he was going to break Kristy's heart.

Tap, tap. Yugi sniffled and wiped away the residue from his nose.

"Come in," he called out. Mr Muto entered, carrying a breakfast try, with toast and tea.

"Morning Yugi," he didn't reply, his Grandpa watched Yugi carefully, he was definitely still shaken up by the advent. He set the tray on the bed, beside where Yugi sat. Yugi still didn't move, Mr Muto gave up, he rubbed the back of his head and went out of the room.

Minuets later, Mr Muto put away the carton of milk, left over from making the tea. The brightly painted kitchen was extremely quiet, usually the boys would be at the circular table at this time, fighting over the last pancake. Their childish playful squabbles always amused him, it was what brightened a rainy morning or a bitter winter greeting.

Ding dong. The door sounded, Mr Muto grabbed his shop keys and walked to the front of the house. The jingling from the large collection of keys was the only sound to be heard in the silent house, although Mr Muto kept it very bright, it was not a cheery house. He approached the clear class door and unlocked it gradually, soaking in the last silent moment he would take in for many days.

"Good day Arthur, Rebecca." Mr Muto greeted them with a warm smile, attempting to cover over the harsh reality.

"Hello my old friend, it's good to see you again." Arthur smiled, Rebecca scanned around the shop and began to boast about all the cards she already owned. The older gentlemen ignored her and they proceeded into the kitchen, it was a far distance from Yugi, it was best to not disturb him.

They sat around the table, each with a steamy cup of tea and an idea on how to resolve the problem.

"I see, so we already know that each Millennium item has it's own special ability, the rod has the power to take control of someone and transport people to the shadow realm. The puzzle however, is a different sort of item altogether. Yugi and Yami had a way of communicating with each when Yami didn't have a physical form. Perhaps, we can reach Yami through the p-" Suddenly, the door opened and Yugi walked in carrying the breakfast tray. His face was still as distant and as saddened as ever, the three pairs of eyes watched him carefully, as he said nothing and walked out again.

"Ah, Rebecca, maybe you should try to talk to Yugi, interact with him a little, but be carefully dear, he's very fragile at the moment." Rebecca wiggled her nose and sprang from her seat.

"Yugi, wait up my darling!" She yelled and charged out of the room, her feet pounded on the stairs and caused the kitchen light figure to wobble. Mr Muto looked over at Arthur.

"Are you sure that was wise?" Arthur took another sip of his tea and began explaining.

"Did you happen to notice that Yugi only ate one bite out of his three slices of toast." Mr Muto glanced over at the tray, it was true, Yugi wasn't eating, the situation suddenly became much more serious.

"You see, I had a friend, very much like Yugi, kind and extremely sensitive. One day, a few years back his wife became critically ill, in a matter of days, she had passed away. It was such a shock to my friend that unfortunately, he fell into a depression and died only a month later." The grey haired man gasped and looked away from his friend, his eye began to fill with tears at this shocking realisation.

"I'm not saying that Yugi will suffer the same way but, we're they close?" Mr Muto sniffled and replied.

"It's much worse Arthur, they're in love, deeply, deeply in love."

"Oh my." Arthur took mouthful gulped. The room fell silent, the eerie sensation of fear filled the room. Arthur couldn't comprehend the amount of pressure and worry his dearest friend was experiencing at that time.

"Well," Arthur looked up from his mug.

"That means we have no time to waste." Mr Muto nodded and they left the kitchen.

The other realm was as cold as the artic however it's temperatures couldn't compare to how dull and numb Yami felt at that present moment. He had remained in that same spot, staring into nothing, feeling nothing, only the bitterness of regret. But Yami always corrected himself, he was doing this for Yugi, he had decided to see this decision as proof that he loved him. This gave him comfort, Yugi could finally know how much Yami truly loved him.

He peered down at his arm, the darkness was now consuming his elbow, he sniffled and shivered, he would give anything to have Yugi with him, to have Yugi cuddle in his chest, sharing his radiant heat. Yami gasped and smacked his head against the purple and black floor. He sat up and shook his head free from blood. Suddenly, he felt something move in his pocket, he reached down and yanked it from his tight leather trousers. His heart jumped into his mouth, it was such a struggle to sallow at all. It was a picture taken at the beach, the place where they shared their first kiss. Yami immediately clutched the picture to his chest and for the first time in hours, he smiled and then sighed, falling backwards in a heavenly daze. Warmth covered his entire body and suddenly, a part of his arm had recovered from the visual virus.

The shadow was now just below his elbow but Yami was so tangled up in memories, he didn't notice this.

"Oh! There you are Pharaoh, Bakura told me that you were here." Yami snarled, instantly recognising the disturbing voice. It was Marik approaching him, his eyes gleamed with a eerie glow.

"Piss off, I don't want you here." Yami sat up and snuck his photo back into his pocket.

"Awww, poor Pharaoh missing his light. Well, severs you right for trying to go against me and my evil plot." Yami glared at him with intense anger.

"You know, there is so much wrong with that sentence, that - I don't even know where to begin." Yami stood and began to walk away.

"You know if you want to return to your light, you can have me instead of Bakura?" He grinned in a menacing manner. Yami dared not look him, he just continued to walk alone, Marik smirked watching Yami leave, his arm being devoured at twice the rate.


End file.
